Saturday 9th July
2:36pm Meal times are really hard work with these girls. Everyone has to be sat upright and quiet before your table gets to go up and choose dinner. They never sit quietly: cue 20 minutes of me telling them off and asking them to calm down. They know Earl will eventually have to let us go eat, so they don’t bother shutting up. I’d be up for just sitting talking until we’re called, but if Earl sees me doing that I’ll get a bollocking so I have to just pointlessly moan at them until we’re the last ones left and Earl wants to eat his own dinner so lets us just go up anyway. Bud’s empty threats of ETB never work; the girls know he won’t go through with it. He should just enforce it one day without taking it back for some credibility.
Keakuki moves to another bunk today. I’ll be sad to see her go, I feel like we’ve become best mates in the bunk and I like hanging out with her. I’ll still see her around camp though; she’s here for the whole summer.
All the other counselors seem so negative about camp at the moment, I need them to be happier and enjoy it more so that it rubs off on me. It’s been so shit this past week with everything; I’m debating going home it’s that shit. I’ve been here for five weeks now and I’m really not enjoying looking after these campers; they’re such hard work and literally won’t do anything I say even after asking a million times. I’m going to go crazy at them soon. I want to change to a younger bunk just to get away. Zoe’s got a good way of dealing with them when they won’t listen, she just sings. She sings non-stop in a really annoying nasally way until they do as she says because they just want her to shut up. Woah there, Zoe in rare ‘doing her job’ moment, glad I recorded that, I can’t imagine it’ll happen again.
7:14pm I feel so shit about everything at the moment. I keep thinking about the Scottish girl who left. I bet she’ll be all tucked up at home now, in the safety of her home and family. I don’t know if I could actually leave, even if I wanted to. I’d be so embarrassed to go home and not see it out after all the fuss I made about coming here all this time. I’m seriously thinking about it though – these kids are a nightmare, Rebecca and Zoe are doing my head in and I’m just so tired – everyone’s so miserable, it’s shit.
8:59pm Britney’s got this little acne-ridden friend who’s really funny and obviously very rich. They’ve made ‘the pact’ that they’ll get married to each other if neither of them have a partner at 30, although I’m pretty sure he’s gay. He minces around with his handbag and pouts permanently for his imaginary paparazzi. I’d say about 80 per cent of the boys here are probably gay. I guess it is a performing arts camp. I sat with him and Britney on the two armchairs she bought to camp especially, earlier. We were out on the grassy area in front of the bunk and I was on one and those two were on the other. They kept doing filthy sex positions and asking me if they were doing them right. I can’t believe she actually brought two proper bright pink armchairs with her; I bet she leaves them behind as well.
I’m a bit jealous of how much the kids love Zoe. Although, they have admitted they only like her so much because she’s shit and lets them do what they want. She is cool, and I’d definitely love her if I was a camper, but she just doesn’t do any work. She gets away with it and is effortlessly the favourite; it’s not fair. The campers love playing with her clothes, she’s got so much cool stuff with her – fun handbags, belts, tops, jewellery – loads of stuff that makes her look instantly cooler. Oh god, I’ve just realised, I’m probably the dorkiest of us three in my ¾ khaki trousers, Birkenstocks, and surf t-shirts. Hmmm, I wonder if my new best friend Zoe will let me borrow some cool things? Not if she ever reads this diary, that’s for sure.