By Rebecca Root
So you’ve heard a few friends talking about summer camp, the guy down the hall has bragged about it, that stand at university is advertising it and the random girl on Facebook won’t stop posting about it. They all seem to be saying the same thing: working as a camp counselor is amazing.
“OMG it changed my life,”
“so many mega lolz”
“best summa eva!”
You’ve heard all about the great friends, the summer romances and the cool kids and you get it. You get that the weather can’t be beaten, it’s a great adventure and apparently you’ll have the time of your life, but doesn’t it seem just a bit too good to be true?
What is it they’re not saying?
Surely months in the middle of nowhere with a bunch of snotty kids can’t be that great? You want to know about the nitty gritty facts, the ones that the guy in 401A just forgets to mention and the dog-tired moments that annoying girl casually forgets to put on Facebook – and you’re right, there are plenty of downsides.
It’s really not that great an experience, everyone is totally exaggerating and just trying to make you jealous. You’d be way happier spending a few months at home doing the same thing every day. Honestly, you would. Just look at all the horrible things that you’d have to put up with summer in, ugh, America…
1. You’d have to make a whole bunch of annoying, new friends
Yep, great as they may be who needs new friends from exotic places? You’ve got great ones right here at home.
2. Sunshine almost every day sucks
Heat shmeat, there’s a lot to be said for a little British drizzle.
3. Getting to play fun games is so boring
C’mon, you are far too old to play dodgeball and make friendship bracelets. It’s books and essays all the way.
4. It’s hard being outdoors all the time
Stale, unhealthy air in the polluted outdoors at home is so much better.
5. New experiences are just pointless
Your same routine day in and day out is just so perfect for you. You know what to expect and new experiences are just overrated.
6. Getting into a gorgeous lake every day is just too much effort
Wouldn’t you prefer an indoor heated pool with views of brick walls instead of valleys?
7. Getting to travel after camp is a waste of money
You can see everything you want on the TV anyway so no need.
8. American food sucks
Who would want a PB and J sandwich, ice cream Wednesdays or Sunday cook out? Fish and chips is fine by you.
9. Camp fires and sing songs are too cheesey
You’re not in some teeny bopper musical, a cup of tea and a movie is far more realistic.
10. Summer romances are embarrassing
Who’d even enjoy being cooped up in the middle of nowhere with exotic hotties?
So you see, you were right. There really isn’t anything that great about summer camp. Sure all your friends that have been give it all the big talk but really it’s not that great. You can have just as an amazing time at home… all summer… in the rain… with the same people… doing the same thing…